


Spoons

by loves_books



Category: Lewis (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-05
Updated: 2015-06-05
Packaged: 2018-04-03 01:41:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4081645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/loves_books/pseuds/loves_books
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Looking at it objectively, Robbie knows he should probably be the ‘little spoon’, more often than not. He is the shorter of the two of them, after all. </p>
<p>It doesn’t always work like that, though.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Spoons

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks again to Wendymr for offering her thoughts on this. As always, I've tinkered with it a lot since then so any remaining mistakes are all my fault.

Looking at it objectively, Robbie knows he should probably be the ‘little spoon’, more often than not. He is the shorter of the two of them, after all. James has that tall and gangly body, with those endlessly long arms and legs, and he does have a surprising tendency to turn into a clingy octopus when the mood takes him, as Robbie has fondly pointed out on numerous occasions. Robbie is shorter and more solid, somehow, compared with the other man’s elegant lines. 

It doesn’t work like that, though. Not always. There are indeed wonderful nights when James wraps those long arms around Robbie’s waist and spoons up behind him, his smooth chest pressed to Robbie’s back and his strong thighs tucked tight up behind Robbie’s. It never fails to make Robbie feel safe and protected, and very much loved. Sleep comes quickly on those nights.

But equally, there are the nights when Robbie is the ‘big spoon’, cradling James’s slender form in the curve of his own bulkier body. Those are the nights when Robbie presses his nose into the nape of James’s swanlike neck and rests one hand low on the younger man’s belly, tugging him back and keeping them pressed as close together as possible. It’s always comforting to know James has chosen to be right there with him, and Robbie will often find himself lying awake for a time, bemused at the fact that they managed to find their way here at all, while the younger man sleeps soundly in his arms.

They don’t always sleep spooned together, of course. Some nights they fall asleep facing each other instead, and James is always the one to tuck his chin in and press his forehead to Robbie’s chest before Morpheus claims him. On those nights, Robbie savours the warm puffs of breath he can feel on his skin, breaths that show him James is alive and safe, sheltered from the sometimes-cruel world beyond their door.

Other nights, particularly if Robbie’s back is playing up or if James is feeling out of sorts, they don’t fall asleep touching at all. Left to his own devices, Robbie tends to sprawl out in the bed, on his back at first then later flipping to his stomach. ‘Starfishing’, James called it once, with a fond smile. James, in contrast, curls up into an almost foetal position on his side when he isn’t wrapped around Robbie in some way, looking surprisingly small and young as the stress of the day falls away from him.

It still feels a little wrong to Robbie, those nights when they drift into sleep without any point of contact between them at all. After so many years of happy marriage, cuddling Val close every night, and after struggling with the pain of an empty bed for so long after losing her, it feels wrong not to simply reach across the mattress and pull James into his arms, just because he can.

Sometimes, he does give in to that urge and slides in behind James, straightening out the tightly curled form and spooning their bodies together after all. More often, though, he doesn’t, because like all partners they sometimes need their space. They’ve both had to be independent for so long, sleeping in their lonely beds with only their hopes and dreams for company, that some nights they don’t need touch. The sound of their partner breathing nearby in the quiet of the night is enough to reassure them both that they aren’t alone any more.

But no matter how they fall asleep, they always wake tangled together in a knot of limbs. Most often, Robbie will have sprawled on top of James, waking to find his head resting on the younger man’s chest, the sound of a steady heartbeat filling his ear. He’ll have tucked one hand unconsciously under a bony hip, and his favourite way to wake James is by sliding that hand lower even as he raises his head to press kiss after kiss to a prominent collarbone.

Together or apart, ‘big spoon’ or ‘little spoon’, it doesn’t really matter at the end of the day. Whichever way they lie, they simply fit somehow, as perfectly suited in this as they have always been in the rest of their lives, both professional and personal. They are two very different men, both slightly damaged though not broken, and they slot together physically as if they were made for each other, in the same way they have always complemented each other mentally. It shouldn’t work, but somehow it does.

Robbie chooses not to overthink it; he has his very own clever clogs to do that, after all. One who could probably summon a dozen quotations and studies about the deeper meaning of their sleeping positions at the drop of a hat. Robbie just knows without a doubt that he sleeps better with James in his bed than he has done for many years. And even when they are woken by a call-out before the sun is up, he doesn’t mind as much as he used to, because James is right there with him, rubbing his eyes and offering to put the coffee on quickly. 

He also knows those are only a few of the thousand small, yet significant, ways in which James has made his life better, and he has a strong feeling James would say the exact same thing about him.

They don’t talk about those things, of course. They probably don’t talk half as much as they should do; not about the really important things, at least. But when Robbie spoons up close behind James, or when James wraps himself around Robbie instead, no words are ever needed. It might be a cliché to anyone else, but Robbie knows they can say with their bodies what neither of them are all that comfortable saying out loud: this is love, unexpected and wonderful for both of them, and no words could ever do that justice anyway.


End file.
